star-dusty love letters to existence
Timing is everything
Timing is gold
Sending our signal
Out into the Fold.
Wandering spotlight
On moment
On space
Leads us to now
To where we must face.
Beyond this mere slice
We must reach
We must grasp
To seize the ordinary
Audibly *gasp*
A shock to the system
Of mediocre life
But what would we be
Without inner strife?
Butterfly visions
Abound in the wrist
– A flick of a tempest
– A wick of a cyst
A fiery sorceress
Tempts and expands
A wizened old mistress
Unfolds her worn hands
A child underneath
A girl yet unborn
A teenager
Sullen and stricken with scorn
All of these women
Are here with me now
They speak in the spaces
That I can’t avow
They leave a mark, sudden
A contemptuous spark
Lines that condemn – and affirm – from the start.
Cringing in blackness –
Greed of the seed
I don’t want to enchant
These things that I need.
Forsaken souls parted,
Drifting afloat
Aloft of the carcass
Missing the boat.
What if our vision
Is only a ruse?
A giant game started
Only to bruise?
Happenchance meetings
Run wholly amuck,
Heart strings strewn all around
And I’m stuck.
A piece of me here,
A piece of me there,
A piece of me drifting
Away to the lair…
Located down,
And deeper down still,
Launching through waterfalls,
Leaping to spill.
I cannot be here
Any more than I
Can keep this work started
And here by my side.
Sightings, songs, lullabies
Starting down the road
I see myself before the seeds
And where I need to roam
“Please be by my side today,
and exist within forever.”
“Of course,” I hear, replied to me
“Why would you think it’s never?”
Do we need an “evil” figure in our lives in order to recognize the good?
Do we need to unite against an “enemy” in order to rally to peace?
I’m feeling these questions acutely right now, especially given current events in the ongoing election. What is happening to us?
Is this some sick social experiment that is testing our collective consciousness? Poking and prodding our conceptual knowledge of what is good, moral, and right while trouncing it with maggot-ridden bait?
((Apologies for the melodramatic statements.))
In time after time, we are taught – and drilled – to know evil exists on the other side of goodness and purity. But to draw lines in the sand is to make them manifest in the first place. To create ‘Us vs. Them’ is to say “Us vs. Them” in the first place. It really takes no other act. Just a simple statement of this duality plants the seed in the minds of those who hear it. But where this seed grows and gains traction is up to the individual.
Are you tending to your thought garden thusly? Maintaining and nurturing and giving it life? Or are you letting it run wild – untamed, overgrown, dying in parts, but robust in others? Flowers choked out by the weeds?
The seed is itself harmless. But what it becomes in us is what really matters, for we are the soil from which the world springs forth.
If you grow and nurture the seeds of division – or ignore them – they will be what you sow in the end. If we need some kind of perceived evil in order to see good – if we need the weeds in order to appreciate the flowers – then perhaps a perspective tilt is in order.
Maybe we need to draw less lines and more circles…
*
I pray and wish for a day when we recognize that darkness is but the shadow of the light – nothing more, nothing less. We need to stop giving it the power it does not deserve. In the reality of the heart, it is ephemeral, changing, and it exists where we let it. This “evil” – this “enemy” we are constantly working to identify – exists only as a part of the whole, and does not define us. It is just a mere seed that moves through us and onto the field beyond.
We are the ones who invite these seeds to stay. We are the ones who plant them.
These seeds have always existed, and always will. What will we do with them? Plant them and watch them grow and take root? Or watch them float by, adrift on the wind?
Glittering sparks, glistening time,
Setting forth intention in rhyme.
Falling suns and perfect moons,
Sitting princes with harpoons.
Hoping for the moment, ripe
Seeking hardship, writing type.
Fortunes wait in stiller tides,
Myriad minds are making strides.
Tied to the sun rays, moon beams, stars,
Traveling space to far flung scars.
Shooting back – arms wide in thanks,
Hearts pour open, fill the ranks.
These sparks know not what care they do,
They only see the One in you.
Starting this blog was putting myself out there in a big way, and while part of me was exhilarated, the other half was screaming to pump the brakes. But I made the decision, ignored the introverted and fearful part of my brain and jumped into the pool, arms open, into the deep.
I have no regrets and I’m enjoying this more and more. Using this space as a collection point, a place for gathering and keeping. An opening of my heart in order to share it with the world. But I have to remind myself that while I love this space and the engagement that exists here, this was not my ultimate goal.
In essence, I do this so that I may know myself.
I truly, really, deeply, do not think well out loud through speaking, or through just thinking alone. I must write it out. For some reason this is the only way I know myself and the depths of my feelings and opinions and thoughts.
If I’m conflicted on something, putting pen to paper helps me sort it out and ask the right questions. If I’m in love with something, the written words flow and express so much more eloquently then anything spoken.
In these writings, in these words on the page or screen, these moments are sacred spaces for which I have entered into my own Self – if such a thing exists. Into the cavern that waits inside so patiently. So willingly. Stilled waters bursting with life.
I’m glad I found it. I’m glad I recognize it. I’m glad I can know myself even better than I could have imagined. Greatness is in this space, and I am only just glimpsing it.
I encourage you to follow your heart, follow it faithfully into the dark so that you may find that light – your guiding star – within.
